Journal: June 9, 2024
I’ve been feeling like I’m doing too much—and desiring new projects. Both like I’m working hard and not making meaningful progress. A hamster wheel at my own pace, but wondering why I’m running.
Long-term projects have these phases. You have to maintain them, and sometimes you don’t feel like it.
That’s how it always goes. You have to parent yourself, grow up, and get the work done.
But the kid’s still gonna ask why.
This self-science is best done privately. Though it’s good to report research on occasion.
Snack Thot
Ruffles jalapeño ranch chips.
Fuckin’ delicious.
Found in the shame aisle.
Public Communication
Heard about a podcast through a podcast (all-time top white phrase) where Tina Fey recommended that Bowen Yang keep some ideas private for the importance of his career.
The standout phrase is, “Authenticity is dangerous and expensive.”
Though I’m partial to, “You are friends with Ariana and SpongeBob now. That is your life.”
(It’s a segment where they share harsh opinions.)
I agree with her. And I sulk because of it.
…
The pandemic lowered our expectations for what to expect on screen.
Public viewership is now expected in many professions. Much work increasingly relies on people making digital content, publically broadcasting themselves for the world to consume, probably for all eternity.
We let the public into our homes because it’s expected. Because it would be weird not to at this point.
…
Yet this footage can easily be weaponized. Hunted for flaws, for opportunities to attack.
This compounds with AI models scraping the web, creating a bigger digital footprint with every step.
Over time, no matter how light anyone walks, it adds up to an insurmountable weight.
When being on the record becomes so intimidating, it gets scarier to speak up.
…
If we’re inevitably pulled into the same endless stream, when do we worry about what’s splashing?
How much does it matter where we are when we’ll be somewhere else soon?
An OK flower photo
I can smell this photo. While not a favorite by any means, it’s a sign of the season, when the star jasmines bloom.
These fragrant flowers are wonderful to walk past, filling the air with a sweet scent.
None of that shit’s pictured here. And that’s exactly my point.
Sometimes I love how things look, but I don’t care to photograph them, because I know it won’t capture what’s worthwhile. A rectangle of eternity is only a snapshot. It cannot provide the experience.
Instead, it’s good to pass slowly. Being with them at their best, in their temporary form.
“Seems like maybe we could take a break from being victims in this situation and start taking responsibility for our own actions.”
